Crumbling Humility

I was feeling bored. Or some kind of way and decided to write. Remember I said it's cathartic for me. The problem was I couldn't think of anything to write about. I was directionless. So I asked my FB family what should I take a stab at writing about. And the first response I got was about Jesse and Sandi Jackson and how they've fucked up their lives.

Well Here ya go... Lets take a quick look at Crumbling Humility...

If you're not aware of this sad fact (you may not be a Chicagoan) another politician has been arrested and is going to jail. For of all things campaign fraud and filing false tax returns.. Word has it that their combined income was somewhere in the neighborhood of $350K (jointly). So what in the hell would give them reason to do something so stupid. So reckless... Simply put They lost their humility.

Temptation is a bitch. Temptation is what makes us strive for something other than our current situation. It's not something that applies to only humans. I'm sure all living beings experience Temptation on some level. A dog sees a plate of food. He/She KNOWS they probably shouldn't eat it. Yet it's there... I mean IT'S RIGHT THERE!!! All juicy and moist and fulfilling. Probably smells better than that shit master served earlier today. Although it's there for the taking the dog hesitates. It KNOWS that it shouldn't do it. It shouldn't even contemplate it. Yet it licks its chops. Looks both ways then eases forward. Lick, look, ease. Repeat. Before the dog realizes he's satisfied, Temptation has won. That need the dog felt has been sated... Till the next plate shows up.....

Now translate this into the Jackson situation (loosely). They're not poor. Hell by most standards they are well off. They aren't uber rich but they make enough to not have the normal headaches most of us have. PROVIDED they live within their means. They're politicians. Hell they're related to Jesse Jackson. A man many of us have read about in history books. They have advantages that many of us don't have. YET... There's a plate of cash just sitting there...IT'S RIGHT THERE!!!! And whats worse, it's got their name on it (along with something that might say campaign fund). Their income is sufficient to satisfy their needs... YET.. IT'S RIGHT THERE!!!!! So they rub their hands together, look over their shoulders, pinch a lil off the side..Repeat...Temptation has been sated... Till next time. Cause after all IT IS RIGHT THERE!!!

So like the dog, who licks, looks, eases and repeats. The Jacksons, rubbed, looked and pinched and pinched and pinched till they got caught.. The question is why? My simple answer is they were human and they were weak. Their humility had crumbled... Sadly this happens to most people in a position of power.

I'm sure being in a position where people kowtow to you, even a small number of people, gives you a sense of entitlement. Preachers and politicians are PRIME EXAMPLES of this. They run for office or they stand in front of dozens or thousands and spread the Word. Whatever their profession that's a rush. Those endorphins kick in. You get high from that feeling of superiority... And each time it happens you risk your humility crumbling.

You pinch and pinch. You make a mistake and you realize that "maybe you SHOULDN'T be doing this." Yet those that are around you. Those that are supposed to keep you grounded "like a spouse" are just as caught up in that mental high as you. Before long, instead of pinching, you're scooping. Hell why not scoop IT'S RIGHT THERE!!! Who's gonna stop you. To the outside world you're well off, so some of these purchases can be chalked up to you spending your own cash. With each purchase more and more of those humble traits you had fade away.

Whats left when the humility has crumbled? Guilt, shame, embarrassment (jail time). And for what? A fix? As anyone that's addicted to any drug or alcohol. It feels good when they're doing it. A sense of power. A euphoric high... A rush... When you start your humility is intact. 100% shield strength... Yet as each temptation comes at you. Each hit on that pipe or sip from that bottle. Each time someone says that sermon touched me or that bill you supported really helped me out, that shield weakens. Each time that lil sexy bitch Temptation sits in your lap your defenses weaken. Then what you KNOW is wrong, doesn't seem all that bad... Hell it seems like the perfect thing to do.

Hell you may even feel entitled to do it. Don't preachers oftentimes take on an air of moral superiority cause they have been "chosen" to spread GOD'S word. They tend to forget that in order to serve ANYONE you have to submit. Submit to those that you're serving, and to those who helped you get there. Haughty folks can't serve. You need some sense of humility... And when that's gone....

You end up like Jesse and Sandi. Arrested and embarrassed. Looking at jail time cause of a bitch called Temptation and a small thing that is the remainder of your humility. Can temptation be avoided. No. Temptation can't be avoided. The very nature of it is to TEMPT YOU. Can you FIGHT its pull. Yes. It's not temptation that gets you in trouble. It's GIVING IN to the temptress. It takes practice and a strong support system. A REALISTIC support system. Not a bunch of YES people who never call you on your BS. You have to admit that you're weak and susceptible to it. You've got to remember to be humble and admit your flaws and faults. You have to maintain some humility.

That's my take on it. This could just be more of my idiotic bullshit. Or there could be a small nugget of sensible truth to these words. Who knows....

Fed Up!!!

Hey world, its been a while. I know most folks could care less about what I write in these pages. Yet alas it's really not for you. It's for me. For my peace of mind. For my piece of sanity that I hold on to during my existence on this planet. I write because it's cathartic. This is my medication and my meditation. If I happen to pass along some morsel of information of news that touches you and brightens your day GREAT!!! If not that is GREAT as well. This just means that I'm not your cup of tea. To each their own.

The few of you who've read my posts in the past may remember that about 5-6 months back I took the plunge into a healthier lifestyle. I had gastric surgery back in Sept.. No this post will not be an update regarding my progress. I get the questions all the time how do I look and how do I feel. I'll probably share more details along that track a little later.

So if I'm not writing to update you on that aspect of my life, what pray tell could be so important (used EXTREMELY LOOSELY) that I'm dusting off these keys to express myself..... Well it's this disturbing bit of news.

Go head.. Let it digest for a second.....
I'll wait for you to finish scratching your heard and yelling at the screen...

You better yet??
Good.
Now I shall begin..


Let me re-establish several facts about who I am as an individual. The following things have been previously established (via past posting)

1. I do not have kids that are naturally mine.I have 2 step kids, a grandson and a host of god kids and other young ones that I look out for.

2. I'm an educated black man.

3. I'm prone to be long winded when I'm wound up..
Now if ANY of those things don't agree with you...I suggest you leave now..

Not having any children of my own I will admit there is a whole gamut of child rearing things that I'm not knowledgeable to. For a lot of parents raising a child is a hands on learning experience. Many of you don't have relationships with those that raised you to turn to for advice. Many have lost their parents before they their first born arrived. For them raising their children is based on books..

Then there is the other side. Those that have elders to nurture and educate them as they nurture and educate their little ones. This is extremely important in black families.I can't speak on any other cultures cause I'm just one black man. We're a very hands on culture. We're very nurturing and loving. Contrary to the media reports that are shown we're not all savages..And yes a lot of times we rely on old tactics  to help with child rearing.. I've heard a TON of wild and crazy shit. NEVER HAVE I EVER HEARD OF GIVING BLEACH TO ANY LIVING THING!!!

I 'm glad the baby is recovering well. My heart goes out to the young father.. Although the story is brief and doesn't go over anything of substance, at least he's attempting to care for his child.. I'm not one to go lightly but I won't bash him for his fathering attempts.. The fact that this kid ACTUALLY BELIEVED the person who told him this shit is where my issue is.

This kid is clueless about life. Sorry, let me correct that. He's clueless period..I'm gonna leave him alone. Simply because by giving his child bleach he's telling me (I'm no professional) that either A) he has no support system at home to help raise this child. B) he's lacking some sort of basic logical reasoning skills. My issue begins at the 14 sec mark of the news clip.

WHO'S THE BITCH WHO TOLD HIM SHE'S DONE THIS AND WHY IS SHE NOT BEING ARRESTED AND HAVING HER KIDS TAKEN FROM HER!!!

That's my gripe.. That's what burning my ever shrinking ass. Out of all of the shit that I've ever heard to do for a child, this is a first. I'm fucking dumbfounded, flabbergasted and down right confused.. I'm so far done that I'm ending this now............. THAT'S JUST HOW FAR GONE I AM!!!..

Bleach to a child.....

Who in the fucking hell has ever heard of a thing....

And his ole simple ass believed her....

He's arrested and she's probably someplace telling her kids that it's ok to let Pastor Joney rub your bare bottom in his office, he a man of the cloth.. Or worse, you can have beer and a crack pipe for breakfast.

Damn idiots.....I'LL BE BACK